On Christmas Eve, David's Dad and Stepmom Jo backed their trailer out of the trailer park in Southern Maryland and drove three hours to Fells Point. They brought all of the ingredients for Christmas dinner - a salt free ham, a salami, and a 5 lb bag of potatoes.
Chain smoking their way up 95, by the time they arrived their trailer had lost a hubcap, and their sheepdog Misty, having annoyed everyone in the cab, was about to get hit.
It was the perfect weather for such company; cold, grey and rainy. They cussed and told David he was a sissy for playing a DVD of Mickey's Christmas Carol. Misty and George went for the same slice of salami David's Dad had dropped on the floor. Being the bigger animal, Misty let George have it, then promptly chopped down on his neck.
George went limp. "Oh my God!" I screamed. David's Dad pulled them apart and I rushed George upstairs to my apartment. I hugged him while he whimpered.
An hour later, David and his Dad knocked on my door, sheepishly asking after George. He seemed better, so I went with them back to Jason's apartment. Sweating in the kitchen, Jo had dumped all 5 lbs of potatoes in a pot. Then she handed me an object that spacemen use on the Moon.
"What is that?" I asked.
"Use it to peel the potatoes," She said.
"I don't know how to peel a potato," I said.
"What kind of a woman are you!" She yelled, slamming the door on her way out to smoke another cigarette. Sniffling, I picked up a paring knife and hated them all.
We opened our gifts; I got two really nice pictures for my new apartment from David; I gave him a clock. Jo gave me mittens, and I hate to admit I liked them. Still, I hope I never have another Christmas like that again.